Late Night Writer Mike Karnell Wants to Take Red Hats Back

-Earlier today,
one of my writers asked for some time on the show to address
an issue he really cares about. So, please welcome Mike Karnell,
everybody. [ Cheers and applause ] Buddy, take a seat.
-Hey. Thanks for having me, Seth. Do you notice anything different
about me? -Do I notice anything different
about you? I guess maybe you look
a little tan. -Oh, thank you.
Yes, spring has sprung, and I’ve certainly
been soaking up the rays. But that is not what I’m here
to talk about. -You are here to talk
about your red hat. -Damn right.
I’m wearing a red hat, Seth. -Okay. Okay. I think I see
where this is going. Please don’t tell me you’re
coming out as a Trump supporter. -Oh, hell, no. Hell, no.
But that’s the problem, Seth. You saw a red hat and immediately assumed
that I was a Trump supporter. And that’s the stigma
I’m trying to get rid of. -That anyone who wears a red hat
supports Trump? -Yeah. And I’d wager that most of, if not all of
the audience members here have a red hat that they love. And ever since Trump’s base
started rocking those MAGA hats, we’ve had to
keep them tucked away out of fear that we’d be
confused for one of them. Well, that ends now.
-How? -I’m taking red hats back. [ Cheers and applause ]
-Okay. Wow. -Yeah. Yeah. -How exactly
are you gonna do that? -Step one — catchy slogan. Do you remember
the Justin Timberlake song “I’m Bringing Sexy Back”?
-Yes. -Well,
I’m gonna take that pop hit and turn it into a rallying cry. Permission to try it out?
-No. -Great. Great!
[ Laughter ] So, when I say,
“I’m taking red hats back!” I need the audience to respond,
“Yeah!” [ Laughter ] Just like in the original song.
Are you guys ready? [ Cheers and applause ] -All right. -I’m taking red hats back! -Yeah!
-Yeah! -Whoo. See?
They’re on board. -I don’t know
if they’re on board or if they just like saying
the, “Yeah!” [ Laughter ]
-Either way, Trump has taken so many things
from me that I once loved — the NFL, Kanye, the idea
of having sex with a porn star. [ Laughter ] I’ve had enough,
and you know what? I’m taking red hats back! -Yeah!
-Yeah! -Okay, well, you’ve clearly
won the crowd over. But how are people
out in the real world responding to you wearing a red hat? -Oh, they hate it. Ohh.
[ Laughter ] That Trump [bleep] does not fly
on these New York streets. When people see me, a portly,
soft-chinned white male, wearing a red hat
from a distance, they assume the worst. You see how Amber is looking
at me from over there? [ Laughter and applause ] Yeah, it’s a lot of that. -What happens
when you get closer and they realize
it’s not a MAGA hat? -Well, they see me, a portly,
soft-chinned white male, as a big part of the gentrification
of their neighborhood and sort of stare at me
like Jermaine is now. -Oh.
[ Laughter ] -But that’s totally fair,
and I can take that on. But I won’t be taking off
this red hat, bud, because before Trump, you know,
the red hats were only worn by the most respected members
of society, like Fred Durst or Papa Smurf.
[ Laughter ] -Okay, so
[Chuckling] just to recap — your plan to take back red hats
from Trump is to have a catchy rallying cry and then to just start wearing
red hats again? -You’re damn right, Seth. We are in a culture war,
and I have to choose a side. But I can’t do it alone, which is why I got you… your very own red hat. -Oh, yeah. Um.
[ Cheers and applause ] Got to be honest.
-Huh? -I feel like… I feel like this hat
is super, super confusing. -Oh. Yeah, from a distance?
For sure. For sure. [ Laughter ] -Yeah.
-Yeah. -Yeah.
I’m definitely, definitely, never gonna wear this. -Yeah, I mean, look how Amber’s
staring at you right now. [ Laughter ]
-Yeah, yeah. Yeah, that’s why
I’m never gonna wear this. -All right. Well, can I at least
do the chant one last time? -Yeah, go for it.
-All right, you guys ready? -Yeah!
-Yeah! -I’m taking red hats back! -Yeah!
-Yeah! -All right, give it up
for Mike Karnell, everybody.

84 thoughts on “Late Night Writer Mike Karnell Wants to Take Red Hats Back

  1. It's actually a brilliant idea and would PISS trump off if someone released a ride hat product that directly contradicts the maga message AND sold more and became more popular! hahahaha Just don't wear the whole trump uniform, red hat, khakis, and a tucked white polo unless it's Halloween and yer also covered in feces.

  2. Don't forget film directors! They wear red hats on the set in order to be seen easily. So add Ron Howard to that list!

  3. Question…are you one of the first to get killed when you beam down to a planet? Try the red-hat only approach & stay alive through the entire adventure!

  4. A Trump-specific version of a bigger problem: Republicans have for decades ruined the American Flag for those of us who are not jingoistic gun-lovin' reactionary bigots. Liberal progressives need to take the Flag back.

  5. Red hats were never "taken" anywhere. No one is stopping you from wearing what you like…. this is so stupid it's unbearable.

  6. Seth is great, but that Cataract commercial at the start is out of touch with reality. Cadillacs are for old rich folk who are trying to impress the folks in the trailer park…

  7. Would've appreciated a little tip to the nation 🐽🐽🐽🐽🐽🐽🐽🐽 happy for you though

    its NO secret i AM god & so are YOU ————–>

  9. Mama Bear hitting us with a fresh pitch. Just needed suckling in his introduction and I’d feel right at home.

  10. I was thinking "wow, I look a lot like that guy" just as he was describing himself as a "portly, soft-chinned, white male." It was a valuable moment of perspective.

  11. While we are at it, can we take Maga back, bc that’s literally what we’ve called my grandmother for almost 30 yrs now, and 2016 is sort of ruining our childhoods now. Not to mention us grandkids have been calling her less as a result.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *