Ellen Tests Her Harvard Grad Writer with a Harvard Admissions Test


The other thing I
like to do online is read stuff on BuzzFeed. They posted that something
that I thought was funny. It’s a quiz about Harvard. It’s an old admissions test
from 1869 that Harvard used. And it turns out we
have someone here on our staff who
went to Harvard. And I know this because he
mentions it every time I see him. And I figured if he’s smart
enough to get into Harvard one time, he could definitely
ace a test from 1869. This is Jason Gelles, everybody. [APPLAUSE] Hello, smarty pants. Hi. So when did you graduate? ’96. ’96, all right and– 1996. Oh, thanks for clearing that up. All right, I made
these multiple choice so that they’re easier for you. OK. OK. But these are– I think they’re hard. OK, a man buys a watch, a
chain, and a locket for $216. The watch and the
locket together cost three times as
much as the chain. And the chain and locket
together cost half as much as the watch. What was the price of each? So we have A, the watch
was $124, chain was $41, locket $28. B, watch was $108,
chain $72, locket $36. C, watch was $144, chain
was $54, locket was $18. D, watch was $103, chain
was $26, locket was $11. Which is it? You know, I wish I wore
my glasses because I can’t see any of these things. Because you can’t see, that’s
why you can’t answer it? Yeah, that’s it. It’s hard to see. But you know the question. Yeah. All right, so– This is a guess. It’s D. D? D. You’re wrong. [BUZZER SOUNDING] No, it was C, the
watch cost $144, the chain– did
anyone know that? [APPLAUSE] Wow. Who wants a job here? [CHEERING] All those people
knew the answer. All right, here we go. Which graph below correctly
shades the portion where the co-seen– Cosine. Cosine, sorry, I
didn’t go to Harvard. Cosine is positive. Graph A– I don’t even
know what a cosine is. I know how to co-sign a loan. I don’t know how to– graph. A, graph B, graph C, or graph D? I assume it’s C.
I’m going to say C. You’re going to say see C? Yeah. You’re shaking your head. Which one is it ma’am? D. No. A. A. A? Yes, it’s A. All right. I was a visual arts major, so– Clearly you bribed
your way to get into– were you want the rowing team? [CHEERING] Aw, Jason. As a consolation, I
know you love hugs. So I’m going to give you a hug. He’s a very cuddly guy,
he loves to be hugged. OK. [CHEERING] Thanks. All right, we’ll be back.

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